Let It Be

The tears came in an unusual place for most moms, but maybe not so unusual for our family. It wasn't an apprehensive kindergartner or the veteran 4th grader, but the shy 3rd grader. She played it so cool this morning. Nonchalantly shrugging when I asked if she was nervous. Smiling like an old pro when the kindergartner confessed she was nervous.

When it came down to the moment, though, the nervous kindergartner dropped my hand, turned for a kiss at her classroom door, and bolted into the room without looking back. 3rd grader and I both laughed at her sudden change of heart and slowly walked over to the 3rd grade classroom.

I asked if she wanted me to leave.

Vigorous headshake. "No."

"Do you want to put your stuff down and look for some friends?"

Even more vigorous head shake and wide eyes. "No!" She clutched her lunch pail tightly and moved closer to me, watching the kids come and put their backpacks down and run off with their friends.

"Are you sure?" She looked up at me pleadingly as if to say, Stop asking, Mom! and my stomach clenched as tightly as her little hand gripped her lunch.

Her teacher opened the classroom door and invited the kids to line up in their spot. In that moment, the full weight of the new school, new teacher, new friends hit her and she looked at me with eyes full of tears and whispered, "Don't go!"

My own eyes pricked with tears as her anxieties became mine, but when she saw my tears she scowled her "Really, Mom?" scowl and we both sort of pulled it together, but not before her sweet teacher saw us both, teary eyed and nervous. She smiled and said hello, but didn't make a big deal, when I just whispered, "Transitions are hard for her." For us. 

She smiled again and said, "How about we talk about a home visit after school? That will help us all get to know each other." I nodded and she turned to the next student, a giant lump rising in my throat. Omigawd, my kid's teacher is my new best friend!

My girl nervously scowled in line and I tried not to tell her to "smile, be friendly, people will want to be your friend if you SMILE!!", because no one wants to be that mom.

A classmate tried to introduce herself, but my girl just scowled and fought back tears, begging me not to go when I told her I would need to leave her at the classroom door, refusing to engage with the sweet, friendly girl in front of her.

She walked into the room, searched for her seat and looked woefully at me when she realized she was sitting with all boys. This morning over breakfast, when she was still chatty and optimistic she had said, "I really hope I don't have to sit with all boys. In first grade everyone at my table was a boy!" I assured her that certainly wouldn't happen, and even if it did, were boys all that bad? (Yes.)

I smiled reassuringly, waved and moved out of her line of sight. Watching for a few minutes as she surveyed her classroom, classmates, teacher. She took a deep breath and watched silently as a girl walked and sat in the remaining seat at their table. Wheew. Not all boys. She still looked pretty miserable, but it was fading ever so slightly, so I turned and walked back to my car, trying not to feel as miserable as she looked.

As I walked to my car, I mulled over every worry I have for my girl and all the things I could do to micromanage the situation. Will she allow herself to make friends? Should I invite her class for a park playdate? Will she retreat into her scowly, sarcastic self-defense mode? What can I do to make her more outgoing? Will kids write her off on the first day because she is scared? Will she feel behind in her studies? Is she behind in her studies? Should I volunteer in her classroom every single day so I can give her extra help if she needs it? Will she be alone at lunch or recess? What if she hates it? What if she never makes friends? What if.....?

I could list out my fears for my kids for days. Months, probably. When I reached my car and turned the ignition The Beatles "Let It Be" was on the radio. I took a deep breath and thought about the prayer my girls and I prayed on the way to school this morning.

We prayed for bravery and new friends. For kind and loving teachers (thank you God for that early answered prayer!). For confidence and wisdom. For the humility to learn and be taught new things. For the courage to make new friends and always be kind to loving to our peers. We prayed a lot about being brave and letting the day...the school year unfold as God wants it to.

We prayed to Let It Be.

God reminded me through a bunch of shaggy haired singers that He has this whole situation handled and I should let it be, man. So, I sighed, sniffled up my own tears and decided to Let It Be.

(But I'm still counting the minutes until her 2:00 pick up time! 61, if you are wondering...)

The Adventure Starts Here

This week we readied Lily for her first trip to summer camp. Alone. (!!)

This morning we dropped her off at the bus. There were tears all around, but she put on a very brave face (and so did daddy and I. Ok, maybe not me.) and with the help of a sweet friend she recognized from school (but didn't actually know until today) they got on the bus together to start their adventure. My momma heart is nervous, but Daddy prayed with her before leaving, we wrote her lots of mail and gave her two verses to hold close to her heart this week. She is set. I think we are, too. It's hard sending your baby off on her own.

Last month we went to visit the camp to give Lily some familiarity with where she would be spending a few days without us. A visit to the camp would surely help us her feel less jitters about going to camp so far away without us. Really, it was for our peace of mind, not hers. She was fine about the whole thing, but we told ourselves that it was all for her.

Visiting the camp did give us a chance to meet the staff and hear more about the planned activities, like the Polar Bear Swim ("Mom! I LOVE jumping into freezing cold water! I am TOTALLY going to earn that patch!"), the arts and crafts and the unit cookouts. She was disappointed to learn that she is not quite old enough for the archery lessons, so no channeling her inner Merida this year. It does give her something to look forward to next year, though.

I never went to Girl Scout camp in California, I was a Girl Scout in Missouri, so I was not familiar with the camps here. I can vividly remember my camp experiences at Camp Cederledge and Camp Fiddlecreek with my troop: Pulling musty mattresses down to lay out our sleeping bags, decorating pillowcases for everyone to sign (note to self: get lily a pillowcase and sharpies), the terrifying ropes course where we felt like we were flying (and dying), helping out as older girls at Daisy and Brownie day camps. It was all so much fun.

Now that I am a leader and know how much stinking work it is to be a Girl Scout leader, I am super appreciative of my leaders and all the things they did to give us such great experiences. Especially considering we were in junior high and the last time I checked junior high girls are frequently less than pleasant to be around. I shudder to remember the drama I helped cause at various Girl Scout camps (Mrs. Hetz, I am so sorry)!

Potential drama aside, I am so excited for Lily to get to go to camp and the amazing adventures that await her there. Horses and swimming, crafts and campfires,  songs and friends and so so much more. I can't wait to hear all about it on Monday!

New Kid in Town

In January I got to take maternity photos of my friend Jamie and a couple family photos with her husband and son before the arrival of their little girl. Keaton was born just a few weeks after the maternity session (yes, be jealous of that tiny tummy!). We had a lovely follow up session when little K was just a week or so old with the new complete family.

Only a few days old here and little K has the wisest eyes. I really loved watching her take it all in, this new world she inhabits. Such a sweetie. Congrats Jamie and Ryder on your sweet, complete family!

Friday Night Book Club - April Pick

Our book club met for the second time on Friday night, to discuss The Book Thief and decide on the next book we read. I know I said I would post the options here, so even those from afar who want to participate could put their two cents in, but I just could not get my ish together last week to make it happen. I know I also said that I would post questions each week on The Book Thief, but again, my ish. Not together.

Also, I read the book in two days and going back and making questions each week left me freaking out that I would accidentally give off spoilers. So, instead, I will from now on post discussion stuff for those who want to, once a month after book club meets, so that I don't have to frantically look through the book to ensure I didn't mention something from chapter 3 when I should only be talking about chapter 2. These things keep me up at night. I can't get any less sleep than I already do, people.

So. We got together. We chatted. We ate German food inspired by the book - Kelly's amazing pea soup and Jamie's homemade bread and Jen's beer steamed bratwurst and Nina's sangria. Ok, maybe that last one wasn't traditional German food, but it was delish. Once we got the oh, so important business of eating out of the way, and I talked myself into getting up and leading the discussion, we had a great time chatting about what we liked and didn't like about the book.

We all pretty much decided that it was a good book, great even, but no one wanted to read it again. It was just too dark and heavy and the funny bits just didn't overcome the tragedies. We discussed our favorite characters, lots of votes for Hans and Rudy. I personally loved Rosa. Sure, she was a bit...prickly, but as soon as Max arrived and she wholeheartedly rallied for him, I loved her. Plus, she was smart enough to choose Hans, right? I mean, how awful could someone who landed him really be?

I loved Max's stories and drawings. I loved the process of painting over Hitler's awful book to create something meaningful and lovely for Leisel. It made me want to make a book like that. Without having to come in contact with Hitler's insanity, of course. I wish I had the forethought to make some books to bring to the meeting, but we have already established where my ish is (say it with me - not together).

After we talked about The Book Thief, we decided to read Eleanor & Park by Rainbow Rowell. It's about two high school outcasts who find that they have more in common than they think and fall in love. It's sweet and sad and wonderful and, oh yeah, I read it in one day. I think everyone will love it and if not, they will certainly have strong opinions about it. I can't wait to meet in April and talk about it!

I found this adorable wallpaper based on the books cover on a blog that I am pretty sure I am going to become obsessed with, Novel Sounds. It is a blog that matches books with music. Yes. Please. If you are interested in reading along with us this month you can feel free to use the carousel below to buy the book or any others that strike your fancy. I do get a teensy, tiny commission on your purchases, so if you do choose to support my habit, I thank you!

The Book Thief, Week 1

To catch you up super quickly, we met last Friday night for Book Club, fun was had by all (or everyone is an amazing actor), we decided to read The Book Thief by Markus Zuzak, and for those who don't want to or can't come to actual book clubby meetings, they could follow along while I talk about it here.

I broke up the book into roughly four parts, but I have already read more than half the book since last night the whole darn thing since Thursday. Officially, we are only reading through Part Two, so if you are following along, I won't be giving anything away past Part Two. Though, you will notice the narrator gives us plenty of glimpses of what is coming ahead anyway, so I can't imagine I'm going to give away much. 

Please, if you are reading along or have read the book already, shoot me a comment with your thoughts thus far. I will get a little pretentious book clubby with some of my questions. Just a fair warning. I'm not, like, trying to be pretentious, it's just an unfortunate by-product of book club questions and their lingo. I may also throw in some questions that I come across that are (in my mind) so pretentious I don't even get them. You know for laughs. Though I am sure you all will get them just fine and I'll look stupid. So basically, it will all even out.

When I use a quote, I will put the page number, but the numbering may be off since everyone has different books, kindles, etc. Hopefully, it will still be relatively easy to figure out where I am in the book when I quote something. I'll make some obsevations, but when I list a question, I'll answer it in the comments section as a part of the discussion, rather than in the post. 

Well, now, where was I? Oh right. Potentially pretentious book club discussion. Here goes nothin'.

The Book Thief, Parts One and Two

A couple of things jumped out at me. First, was the use of color as descriptors. Do you have a favorite? Mine is when the narrator describes the sky over the battlefields of The Great War as being milky white and spreading over everything.

Second is how the narrator (Death) describes gathering souls. Did you notice any in particular and what were your thoughts about how Death describes that process?

"I walked in, loosened his soul, and carried it gently away" pg 11 

"It was exactly when I knelt down and extracted his soul, holding it limply in my swollen arms. He warmed up soon after, but when I picked him up originally, the boy’s spirit was soft and cold, like ice cream. He started melting in my arms. Then warming up completely. Healing." pg 17

Death tells us he made numerous mistakes when it comes to Liesel, saying,

 "Mistakes, mistakes, it’s all I seem capable of at times. For two days, I went about my business. I traveled the globe as always, handing souls to the conveyor belt of eternity. I watched them trundle passively on. Several times, I warned myself that I should keep a good distance from the burial of Liesel Meminger’s brother. I did not heed my advice.
From miles away, as I approached, I could already see the small group of humans standing frigidly among the wasteland of snow. The cemetery welcomed me like a friend, and soon, I was with them. I bowed my head." pg 18 

Why do you think he felt so drawn to the funeral and why do you think he felt it was a mistake to go?

What were your impressions of Hans and Rosa when you first "met" them vs by the end of Part Two?

Who is your favorite character so far and why?

The last sentence of Part Two:

"Beneath her shirt, a book was eating her up."

Why do you think Liesel is so drawn to books that she feels compelled to steal them when necessary?

OK! That is it for this week! I'm also curious how many people read through the whole thing already? It was such a quick read. I'm finding myself already drawn in to read it again. I can tell it is going to be one of those books where I notice more and more with each read through.

Friday Night Book Club - The Book Thief

It's official, we have a book club. Friday night rolled around and I nervously waited to see if anyone other than my best friends would show up to book club. Fifteen amazing women came to my house and put themselves to the mercies of my crazy ideas. It was fabulous. We laughed and talked and played a goofy game that I made up and ate gelato and drank wine. Yes. MY book club has gelato and wine. If getting to read juicy YA novels wasn't enough, we have gelato, people.

Not to rub in chocolaty Italian desserts to those who can't make it to our meetings, I'm sure it will be just as fun to follow along as we read here on the blog. I can't say that my writing is nearly as delicious as gelato and wine, but I'll try. At the first meeting it was decided that we would read The Book Thief. Outsiders got one vote (poor Ponyboy!) and Thirteen Reasons Why didn't get enough votes to overwhelm the The Book Thief contingency.

For those of you following along, I will do a small summary/discussion each Friday. We will divide the book into four parts.

Week 1 - Prolougue through Part Two
Week 2 - Part Three through Part Five
Week 3 - Part Six though Part Eight
Week 4 - Part Nine through The Handover Man

That is just the order of how we will go through the book here on the blog, if you are like me, you will read the whole book in one sitting, anyway. I read the first page and had to tear myself away; I can tell it's going to pull me right in and not let go and it's midnight.

Ain't nobody got time to stay up all might reading, so I'll get my start tomorrow. Besides, these late night Olympics aren't going to watch themselves. I can only stay up so late, people and people with a death wish luging (Or is it lugeing? Sledding. They are all uber-sledding. Let's call a spade a spade, k?) at a million miles an hour wins.

You can click the link below to purchase a hard copy of the book or a kindle copy from Amazon. I do receive a small amount of money when you purchase from the Amazon carousel and you would receive high fives from my husband for saving him some money on my book habit.

Downton Abbey Season 4, Episode 4

It's Saturday and I am just now getting to writing about last week's episode. I am so off my game right now, people. Of course, it is all because of my issues with time management, but I am going to blame this season's writers instead. Because that is easier and who wants to admit that they suck at making time for stuff? Actually, the real travesty is that this was the best episode this season in terms of story and character development, so of all episodes to rant and rave over, this was the one, right?

STOP MOANING, EDITH - Well, vintage Mary is back sniping at her sisters every word. When she made the first snide remark, I nearly choked on my ice cream. I thought that Mary was gone, but, no, as the episode moved on she rolled her eyes, snipped and sighed whenever Lady Edith dared speak - or even breathe - in her presence. Funny though it was, after the third or fourth time I started to fear that we were reverting to their old, ridiculous sibling rivalry. Since we saw Edith slink alone into a London doctors office, I suspect she is going to be moaning about quite a lot in the coming weeks. 

DON'T GO, TOM! - So uncomfortable with his new life, Tom begins talking about making changes. I sit up straighter in my chair expecting to hear him say he is interested in politics again but am quickly disappointed to hear him talking about going to America. America? Really? The fact that he even says this is laughable because he has a job he likes and family to support him in raising his daughter. He and Mary seem to really be becoming friends and he even has a friendly understanding with Carson and Hughes downstairs. Tom Branson may not have see Far and Away, but I have. Ask Nicole and Tom about how 'Murrica works out for Irish immigrants, let alone Irish immigrants with kids. STAY PUT, dude. 

THEY KISSED AND MADE UP! - And I tried not to jump up and down for joy! Mrs. Hughes did what she shudl have done in the beginning and told Bates what happened, Bates and Anna made up and everything is finally ALL RIGHT.

EXCEPT IT'S NOT - Everything is NOT alright and Bates makes sure we know it. It is FAR from ALRIGHT and he will not let it rest. Bates has revenge in his eyes and at the end of this episode I have anger in my heart. 

Here is why:

In the first two and half seasons of Downton Abbey, the characters and their lives were glamorous, exciting,and heartbreaking. Using the tragedy and pain of the Titanic and World War I as a backdrop, the Crawleys navigated the changing world mostly with grace and class. Lady Sybil challenged how the family thought of women and class, Matthew helped the family recognized they had souls. Without them, Lady Cora is left to holding up the nice person fort and she just isn't up to the task, I am afraid. 

The problem with the show for me now is that so much of Downton Abbey's stories rely on the changing times. No doubt the 20s brought sweeping changes to England, but for whatever reason we just aren't seeing them. It was the Jazz Age, after all, and all we have gotten has been teaser episodes with Rose that are uninteresting and kind of vapid. Rose, I am guessing is supposed to inject some youth that Sybil took with her when she died, but she's more Miley Cyrus than Fellowes probably counted on. 

I'm mostly annoyed because it really feels like all my favorite characters are regressing or becoming something they never were or should be. Mary is back to being a biatch to her sister, Edith is back to being mopey and tragic, Bates is becoming vengeful and angry, Robert is grasping to keep power over an estate he never really cared for, Tom has not only lost his revolutionary streak, but is on the verge of giving up entirely and Thomas, without a worthy adversary or partner is crime is left to fester and be the jackass we all know he is. 

It all leaves me disappointed and bummed out and yet completely unable to cut the cord on this show. 

Sidenote: Isobel + Granny = TOTAL WIN. These two are comedy GOLD. I cannot wait until Lady Cora's mother comes back because OH MY GOSH THOSE THREE. 

Julian. DO NOT LET ME DOWN.

Are you YA enough for this book club?

My bedroom growing up had a whole wall of floor to ceiling bookshelves. The previous owner had used the room as an office, and when fourth grade me saw those bookshelves I made it my mission to fill those shelves. I almost did, too. By the time we moved I'd amassed a collection of nearly 1,000 books. Ramona, The Babysitters Club, Sweet Valley High, Wuthering Heights, Jane Eyre, Secret Garden, Sleepover Friends, Matilda, R.L. Stine, Anne of Green Gables...my collection was non discriminatory. Little Women shared shelf space with blonde twins from California. Really bad teenage love stories cozied up to Gone With the Wind. 

I didn't love reading right away as a kid and to encourage me to read more my parents bought me literally every single book I seemed vaguely interested in. Their (very expensive) scheme worked, I loved to read and in the process found a very special place in my heart for YA lit - Young Adult literature. 

A few years ago it came to my attention that my friend Megan is also my literature soul sister and ever since then we have been trading books books like the madwomen we are. A couple years ago she became the Scholastic book mom for her kids classes and turned me onto such literary gems as Twilight, The Hunger Games and amazing teenage mermaid stories. We used to hide our YA shame, but this week I decided that enough was enough. Not are we no longer hiding our love of the Young Adult novel,  we are starting a book club. 

That's right. Young Adult novel book club is happening. As it turns out, we are far from alone in our taste in books. Within about 2 hours of announcing on Facebook my crazy plan of a book club I got 15 or so ecstatic messages from friends ready to read the angst. Bring on the coming age stories and the dystopian heroes and heroines. Bring on the romance and misunderstandings. Bring on the vampires and mermaids, because we are taking them all on. 

If you are local and interested, send me a message. If you aren't or don't fancy being in a room with a bunch of 30 year old women reading teen lit (well, when you put it that way...), you can follow along here on the blog. Our first meeting is February 7 where we will be deciding between one of these three books. I scoured Amazon for ideas and decided to narrow it down between a social issues book, a classic, and a soon to be released book-to-movie title.

Vote for the title that most interests you in the comments below and the pick for the Friday Night Book Club will be revealed on the 7th. If you are so inclined, you can request to join the Facebook page where we will let our literary freak flags fly high and proud. If you choose to buy any of the titles, please consider clicking through to Amazon via my carousel at the bottom of the post. I will get a small percentage of each purchase, which will make my husband happy considering how easy a Kindle 1-click is at 2 am when I have just finished book one of a particularly amazing series and cannot possibly wait another second to start book two. 

If you can relate, this is probably your kind of book club. 

Thirteen Reasons Why by Jay Asher

Clay Jensen returns home from school to find a strange package with his name on it lying on his porch. Inside he discovers several cassette tapes recorded by Hannah Baker - his classmate and crush - who committed suicide two weeks earlier. Hannah's voice tells him that there are thirteen reasons why she decided to end her life. Clay is one of them. If he listens, he'll find out why. Clay spends the night crisscrossing his town with Hannah as his guide. He becomes a firsthand witness to Hannah's pain, and learns the truth about himself-a truth he never wanted to face.

Thirteen Reasons Why is the gripping, addictive international bestseller that has changed lives the world over. It's an unrelenting modern classic.

The Outsiders by S.E. Hinton

According to Ponyboy, there are two kinds of people in the world: greasers and socs. A soc (short for "social") has money, can get away with just about anything, and has an attitude longer than a limousine. A greaser, on the other hand, always lives on the outside and needs to watch his back. Ponyboy is a greaser, and he's always been proud of it, even willing to rumble against a gang of socs for the sake of his fellow greasers--until one terrible night when his friend Johnny kills a soc. The murder gets under Ponyboy's skin, causing his bifurcated world to crumble and teaching him that pain feels the same whether a soc or a greaser. This classic, written by S. E. Hinton when she was 16 years old, is as profound today as it was when it was first published in 1967.

The Book Thief by Markus Zusak

Markus Zusak's unforgettable story is about the ability of books to feed the soul.

It is 1939. Nazi Germany. The country is holding its breath. Death has never been busier, and will become busier still.

Liesel Meminger is a foster girl living outside of Munich, who scratches out a meager existence for herself by stealing when she encounters something she can’t resist–books. With the help of her accordion-playing foster father, she learns to read and shares her stolen books with her neighbors during bombing raids as well as with the Jewish man hidden in her basement.

In superbly crafted writing that burns with intensity, award-winning author Markus Zusak, author of I Am the Messenger, has given us one of the most enduring stories of our time.

Downton Abbey, Season 4 Episode 3

So, I have given myself permission to post these updates when I can, which obviously, isn't very timely these days.On Sunday night we were living it up with the cool kids at Benihana celebrating my friend Megan's birthday, so shock of all shocks, I missed Downton Abbey. What is Downton compared to onion volcanoes? Nothing, that's what. And those onions were delicious. And I really want one of those grills in my kitchen. And one of those chefs while we are at it.

Alright, on to the fun stuff:

Tell me you see it? 

THE BREAKFAST FROM HELL - Pardon my french, but ANNA HAD TO EAT BREAKFAST NEXT TO HER RAPIST. #*@&%$ My stomach is in knots just thinking about it. Did anyone else feel like crying in the first few minutes of the show? Between Anna and Bates and Tom and Lady What's Her Name, we were three minutes into the show and I was sure I was not going to make it. I was getting a little tired on Tom feeling sorry for himself for not fitting in, but I definitely loved how the Lady got to the nitty gritty of Tom's heartache and I loved her for it. But not enough to remember her name, apparently. Sidenote: BEST LINE of the series or maybe my life, and it didn't even come from Granny: "I have always found something foreign about high spirits at breakfast." Me too, Carson, me too.

Watching Bates fumble and flounder around Anna is as heartbreaking as it is annoying. I mean, who falls and bangs up their head as much as she did, wake up, dude!. She was full on beaten up. Like to a pulp! Between Anna's silly line of not telling Bates because he will kill the man, and the fact that I suspect that the Crawley's will start thinking Bates is beating his woman, I am fed up. I haven't been so annoyed with a story line since, well, Bates was in jail.

DING DONG THE WITCH IS GONE! - This almost makes up for the hating on Bates and Anna. While I hate that she's such a conniving idiot, it was the conniving idiocy that got her the boot. Finally! Way to go Mrs. Hughes. I might have to start a fan club, I love her so much right now. Though, I did cringe at her saying she'd pin her down and rip her clothes off her if she had to. Just felt tacky considering Anna's situation and even a schemer like Edna dosen't deserve that. All in all, though, well played Mrs. Hughes, well played. Ever since last episode, every time Edna walked in I just couldn't shake the image of Voldemort. She's so snake-like, it just fit too perfectly! She got what she deserved, and then some, leaving Downton with her snaky tail between her legs, but not before she gave Thomas the ol' one two. At which I laughed heartily, because, hello, pot, meet kettle. Sidenote: I love how Mary totally came through for Tom, offering him sound advice in his hour of need and that he had the good sense to take good advice when he hears it (*cough* Anna).

WALK OF SHAME - Who knew Edith had it in her to be so naughty? Although, there wasn't a whole lot of shame in her walk, she did try to play dumb when Aunt Rosalind called her out on her comings and goings. Does anyone else get a bad feeling about this? I think Aunt Rosalind's outburst is a foreshadowing of very bad things to come. "The world may be changing, but some things never will." Gulp. Something about the mentally ill wife and Germany and divorces and revoking one's citizenship isn't ringing true with me. Edith! You are making me nervous, girl! Don't be stooopid!

MARY'S MISTAKES - So, Lord Goodlookingham has fallen hard for Lady Mary, so hard in fact, that her family schemes to get them together socially as much as possible in the course of, what, a week? Has everyone brainfarted on the fact that the woman's husband died six months ago? What in the hey is everyone's all-fired rush to get Mary, well, married? Mary has a good time with him, laughs, smiles, Isobel has a sweet moment where she says how she hopes she will see him often blah, blah, blah. Gillingham asks Mary to marry him twice, both times he is rebuffed.

The second time, when he says she would fill his mind, she says that her mind is too full of Matthew to consider anyone else. It was sweet, it was lovely, it was what you might expect a happily married, recent widow to say. Then, in what is becoming an annoyingly expected move, Lord G asks if he can kiss her, one for the road, and all. They kiss, her wedding ring in clear view as   they snog, and I rolled my eyes, but I was thrilled she turned him down. We She needs more time.

And then, sneaking in just before credits roll, Mary says to Tom, "I think I made a decision I'll regret the rest of my life." *Face-palm* MARY! Are we still mourning, or what? You made a decision, stick with it. I don't know why I found that so ridiculous, but I did.

FAKE AMERICAN ACCENTS SHOULD BE BANNED - Downton Abbey is going global and diverse with the addition of American bandleader, Jack Ross who is black and therefore even less acceptable for little Rose to fall for than if he were only a wretched American. To add insult to injury he has the worst American accent I have ever heard. To be fair, I did double check on IMDB, just in case, because the truly worst American accent I have ever heard turned out to be from an American (it was this guy, on Foyle's War). Bad accent aside, he's cute and I suspect a juicy story line there, though I cannot for the life of me figure out how we are going to see him again.

So, what do you all think? I know there is a whole thing going on downstairs, but I am still just not interested in Alfred/Ivy/Jimmy/Daisy's whatever. Am I the only one?

Fairytale Town Maternity Pictures

When our friends Jason and Carolyn announced they were moving to Tennessee I could have spit nails. My husband and I have known Jason since before we were married. Jason and Aaron would have gaming days where Jason would bring over his PC and he and Aaron would play computer games all day while I made snacks and watched lame tv. Later, we were all in Bible studies together and always had great conversations about life and faith and books and stuff. A few years ago Jason introduced us to a friend of his named Carolyn. Within minutes of meeting her I knew that Carolyn would someday be his wife, because it was not at all possible that there could be a more perfect woman for him than she.

Very quickly, Carolyn and I became friends, meeting for coffee and wonderful conversations. One of my favorite things about Carolyn is that she dives right past small talk straight into soul talk. She is one of those people that you just don't mind opening up to, even if you just met her. You really forget that you haven't known her all your life when you are talking to her, which is why when they moved to Tennessee eighteen months ago I may have shed more than a few tears.

Several months ago, my phone rang and it was a giddy Jason and Carolyn announcing they were pregnant. It was right around when I started taking pictures more seriously and my second thought (after SQUEEEE!!!) was, oooh I hope I get good enough to be able to take maternity pics!

In December, they came back to Sacramento for Christmas, a whirlwind baby shower, and yes, a maternity photo shoot. I love all the pictures I have been honored to take in the last few months, but these might just be my extra special favorites.

Downton Abbey, Season 4, Episode 2

Did you have to scrape your jaws off the floor last night, like I did? File last night's episode under: Did Not See That Coming. 

As a whole, the last three seasons of Downton have been exceptionally well written. Last season, Fellowes and his writing team successfully blended the heartache with sweet moments. Not just Anna's heartache as she waited for her husband to be exonerated, but Tom and Cora as they worked through Sybil's death. Matthew and Mary's romance was the perfect foil to all the tears. While there were plot points that I didn't like, the whole season blended seamlessly together, making me love Downton and it's people all the more. I am as definitely wondering if they will strike that balance as well this season. 

Spoilers! Don't read if you haven't see this episode.

NOT ANNA! - Take a good, long look at that photo up there, it will likely be the last sweet moment between Anna and Bates this season. And I am hopping mad about it. Anna and Bates are, hands down, my favorite Downton couple, so imagine my horror and downright outrage at last night's episode. Am I too invested in fictional characters? Perhaps. I also think it is completely ludicrous that Anna would not tell Bates because she thinks he will do something awful and "he was already in prison once, they wouldn't let him off again." Yeah, he might do something awful if you call beating up his wife's rapist awful, but what exactly is she thinking he's going to do? I have never been through such a terrifying experience, so I can't truly speak to how she should or should not react, but Downton knows and loves Anna and would rally around her, don't you think?

Even though I find the plotline totally annoying because it puts my favorite people in the worst possible pain, I recognize that this "plot twist" was an all too common reality in those days, both upstairs and down. It will be interesting to see how these characters work through the horrors of rape, even as I wish it wasn't so. I guess I'm going to have to give up my hopes for cute little Bate's babies, because, I swear, if they add in the rape = pregnancy cliche I AM SO DONE. (Empty threat.) Sidenote: I died a little when Anna had to cordially say good bye to that scumbag.

OH, MOSELEY - Just when you thought Moseley couldn't possibly get more pathetic, he does. If you look up the term "sadsack" in the dictionary, Moseley will be right there, right next to Eeyore. He does provide some needed comedy, though, so thanks for that ol' Mose. He does seem to be getting more screen time than usual, and PBS teases us with "the unlikely iron in Moseley's soul may provide inspiration to one who needs it most," so I am hoping good things are in store.

SHE AIN'T NO O'BRIEN - Interesting that in the very same episode that Anna is raped, it is implied that the despicable Edna Braithwate may have done the very same thing to Tom. I feel creepy just watching her. Every time her rotten mug is on screen I feel like I need to go wash my hands and the combined ickiness of her and Thomas would be enough to make me rush to the shower to get the dirty off, but I don't have DVR, so I suffer on. My visceral reaction is either a testament to the acting and writing or my insanity. I'll take either. I do greatly miss O'Brien. Deep (waaaay deep) in there she had a conscience, making her a different (dare I say better?) beast than Thomas or Edna.

ALFRED + IVY + JIMMY + DAISY - Alfred pining over Ivy, Daisy pining over Alfred, Jimmy seemingly pining over Ivy. I'm pretty sure that there will be a Jimmy/Thomas storyline in there somewhere. His infatuation with Ivy dosen't ring true to me. I like that Mrs. Padmore is (mostly) sweet to Daisy, but mostly, the downstairs goings on are really boring to me so far.

EDITH - And while we are on the subject, I am already bored with poor Edith and her romance. Yawn.

Anyone else concur or completely disagree with my assessments? Also, if you can, comment here rather than on Facebook to keep spoilers to a minimum. Thanks!

All Dried Up, A Visit To Folsom Lake

I hadn't really noticed that it hadn't rained here in a dreadfully long time; not until people started posting photos of their trips to Folsom Lake and comments about how low the lake has been. It has been relatively low for a couple years now, so I really didn't think much about it. I mean, how low is low? A friend recently told me that it was low enough to see the remains of the town that the lake covered when the Folsom Dam was built. Yeah, that's pretty low.

Pretty soon after that, the history buff in me started to obsess about the tragic romanticism of a forgotten town submerged under water. I have a thing for old buildings and apparently that obsession extends to Gold Rush era building foundations, turn of the century door hinges and nails, and forlorn sawed off tree trunks. According to wikipedia (so it must be true!), Mormon Island was the location of Sacramento's first ball in 1849 and was the starting point of the Gold Rush.

I packed up the kids and dog and we ventured out to see what we could find. Along the way, we found out the dog gets carsick. That was fun, but thankfully didn't spoil our day. It was kind of eerie walking through parts of the lake usually reserved for boating and swimming, kicking old Coors cans from the 70s and wondering if rubbish like that counts as "artifacts" or trash. Artifacts are illegal to remove, so we took the safe bet and left the pop top can there for all to marvel. You're welcome.

This isn't the first year that parts of Mormon Island have been visible and unlikely it will be the last, but I do believe that it is the lowest the lake has been since the dam filled the area in 1955. Technically, the buildings we see are on the outskirts of town and are believed to be an old winery, the main town is still submerged. The plus side, I guess, is that it's been quite a boon for the State Park. The ruins are bringing quite the crowds and parking money to boot.

Rain, rain, come and play. We can see the Island another day.

Downton Abbey Season 4, Episode 1

Downton is back and it feels so good. I can honestly say that there isn't much I love more than British television. The accents fool me into believing that I'm not really just watching a British version of Dynasty or Dallas or 90210. The Brits love drama and mystery and they do it well and with a classy accent. I like to pretend that they don't have reality tv and that the BBC is some sort of tv programming utopia, even though I am fairly certain that Big Brother originated there. 

I have a couple friends who managed to watch the 4th season online with sneaky tactics, but I chose to wait to watch it. Mainly because, as much as I love Downton, I am really too lazy to figure out how to watch it online. When my friend Stella was watching it she would come to me saying, "Oooooh, Claaaaire! This season is SCANDALOUS!" So that is my only spoiler. This season is scandalous. Which is either great information to have or not. I am trying not to let my imagination run away with itself, and last night's episode gave me lots to ponder. 

As usual, if you aren't caught up, stop reading after the photo. More importantly, if you aren't caught up, why are we friends?

Just adding some salt to the wound....couldn't help it. 

First, I want to make a couple observations. One is that this episode was a long two hour episode for us, but was two separate in England. After watching last night and feeling like a few things resolved rather quickly/awkwardly, I realized it was partly because it had been spread over two weeks for them (the other part is because the story sucked, but we will get to that later). Second, take a moment and let it sink in that last season's finale was really the Christmas Special. Merry Christmas, Matthew is dead. Why do you hate Christmas, Julian?

Ok, moving on. 

HOW DARE SHE!? - We open the episode to sweeping views of Downton and someone leaving in the dark of the night/early morning. Everyone is in a major thither when they realize that it was O'Brien. I mean how dare she leave Downton in the lurch, and for a member of the family no less? Scandalous! Has she no decency? No, no she dosen't. We have spent three seasons gasping at the antics of O'Brien and her leaving seems to be the most exciting thing to happen in Downton since, like, ever. It's like no one remembered the time that Mary had a dude die on her during, ahem, sleep or that Edith's fiance left her at the altar or that Ethel got pregnant by a scumbag and had to give up her baby to his parents. 

MOVE ON, MARY - The family is in mourning. Six months have passed and everyone is asking if Mary is ever going to, you know, get over the shock of losing her husband on the day their child was born. Everything seems to have plodded along around her in that time and people are beginning to wonder if Mary will ever be her old self again. Because six months is plenty long enough to mourn the loss of your husband. I understand that having your star be even more monotone than ever for half the season puts a bit of a damper on the storyline, but I kinda feel that a chick should be allowed to be seriously bummed out for longer than six months after her husband dies. ON THE DAY YOUR BABY IS BORN. But, I get it, plotlines and death taxes and stuff. Super important. Besides, monotone Mary is bad enough, mega monotone Mary is enough to make me need to go onto antidepressants. 

THOMAS vs. NANNY - Early in the episode we see Thomas going head to head with the Nanny and I think to myself that ha, here is our new foe, because, surely, after the way Bates did him a solid last season with the job, he will let it rest for Bates and Anna. Damn. Not so much. I did enjoy Nanny and Thomas going at it a bit and would have liked to see that into the next episode at least. When Thomas first went to Cora about how awful Nanny was, I was thinking that Thomas was kind of an ass. Unless I missed another comment in there when she called Sibby a half breed I literally gasped and yelled, "Oh, no she didn't!" much to my husband's amusement. And any fears I had about there not being enough backstabbing to go around once O'Brien left were quickly assuaged by the arrival of Edna. Which brings me to...

EDNA? REALLY? - I have so many angry feels about this, but I must admit, she is going to be an entertaining adversary for the poor Bates'. Those poor, poor Bates'. Cannot catch a break. I predict that Anna gets the sack because Edna and Thomas' evil ways and Rose dragging her into her schemes are going to be her undoing. And Bates will go to because he is a stand up guy, and maybe finally they will get their hotel and babies. I want to see cute little Bates babies! Also, please stop introducing characters with E names. Edna, Ethel, Edith. I have to pull up the character guide to keep them straight! 

YOU CAN DO BETTER FOR CARSON - Carson is really shaping up to be one of my favorite characters. His has actually seen the most growth over the series . He went from cranky curmudgeon to cuddly curmudgeon as he watches his world slowly unraveling around him. He can see the days are numbered in the aristocratic and is taking the punches like a stoic champ. First season Carson would never have called Mary to task and reminded her that grief or not, she has a job to do. Go fourth season Carson! It's probably because of my love for Carson that I feel personally insulted that they gave him the stupidest story arc since cousin Patrick (I'm still mad about that). It was dumb when they had his singing/dancing partner come back the swindle him and it was even dumber that we are supposed to feel sorry for him when Carson cuts him out after he falls on hard times. He's a swindler! Of course he fell on hard times!

"You sang and danced together on stage? Doesn't that mean anything to you at all?" Mrs. Hughes screeched at him and Aaron and I busted up laughing, and then I began to wonder....oooh is that a euphemism for something? Exactly what kind of singing and dancing was this? Is this the scandal? IS CARSON GAY, TOO? Um, no. (Thanks a lot, Stella. Now I'm imagining scandal where there isn't any.) Swindler guy swindled his lady in the gay nineties (or sixties, or whatever) and Carson was real mad, like you would be, and didn't want to talk to him. Meddling Isobel and Mrs. Hughes had to get all up in Carson's business so he could forgive him blah, blah, blah. Carson is so much better than that. Frankly, so are Isobel and Mrs. Hughes. To use their characters in a contrived story that is basically to get them airtime is lame. 

PLEASE STOP MAKING EDITH BORING. The end. Please. PLEASE.

There is so much else, but these are the things that really jumped out at me. What about you? Also, I want to hear your wild predictions in the comments1

Snow

I have a love hate relationship with snow. I love to look at it, but really hate to be in it. I think my father, who loved skiing, was always deeply disappointed that I took after my mother's lodge-loving ways rather than his mountain-loving ones. One of the things I love best about living in Sacramento is our proximity to visiting the snow. Don't make me drive in it or be out in it for any longer than a half an hour, but I will happily sit by a fire with a cup of tea watching the snow for hours on end and then happily head home before teh slush really sets in. I do regret that there is never a possibility of a snow day around here. Although, it was something like 75 degrees today, in January, so I can probably make do.

Going to the snow was bribery to get my kids to sit for a family portrait with the dog. Actually getting to have the dog in the portrait was also bribery, as not one child was remotely interested in taking pictures unless Rory could be in them, too. They were only still for about five minutes so I am thankful any pictures came out, let alone several. Also, those Christmas cards are quickly becoming Valentine's cards. I'd say my resolution for 2014 would be to become more organized, but I think that is already out the window.