9am: Wake up! Remember it’s 2nd Sunday and the Antique Fair at W/X is on!. You have no cash, but you can’t get any now because you are already running late for church. You haven’t even gotten out of bed yet.
9:30 am: Remember that your husband has a meeting all afternoon and can’t go with you to the W/X so it is just you and the three littles.
9:35 am: Consider not going. It’s hard with the littles.
9:37 am: Of course you are going to go, you always go, littles or not.
9:38 am: Begin thinking of potential bribes. $1 to spend on whatever they want has worked in the past, ok, let’s go with that.
10:00 am: Quit thinking about the Antique Faire and start dressing kids! You’re late!
12 pm: Church is over, time to high tail it our to the W/X. Kids are complaining they are hungry, but you decide to save time and get food at the Faire. Exit freeway and remember you still have no cash. Head off to do that while the kids whine and complain about how hungry they are and why are we stopping? and WHAT you have to get MONEY?! GEEZ, MOM!
12:02 pm: Ask yourself why you do this alone every stinking month and then tell the kids
to be quiet or they won’t eat you’ll only be a second and you’ll be right back, you just have to run to the ATM.
12:10 pm: You’re parked. You’re out of the car. You’re IN.
12:11 pm: Three little voices
loudly sweetly remind you they are hungry. So you get pizza. What kid dosen’t like pizza?
12:20 pm: Your kids didn’t love the pizza. Lemon garlic olive oil and sausage artisan pizza didn’t quite appeal to the preschool palette, so you ate yours and theirs. It was delicious. Now they are sharing a giant kettle corn, making this a meal all of you might regret later.
12:30 pm: Kids have eaten, but have started to fight over the kettle corn.
12:35 pm: Your oldest starts complaining loudly and saying things like* “Ugh! My BACK hurts!” “We have been walking FOR SO LONG!” (15 minutes) “This is the WORST DAY EVER!”
12:40 pm: you contemplate getting new children. Oh look! There is a table full! (Not at all creepy….)
12:45 pm: You spend the bribery dollar. Takes 10 minutes to decide on a few McDonalds toys you already have at home (and were probably purchased at last months faire). Now a new form of bribery needs to be determined.
1 pm: You test out some furniture. It’s agreed that you should buy the whole set. You’re extremely proud of her taste.
1:20 pm: Everyone has finally reached their limit of shopping/whining/walking, are now broke and treats are in order.
1:30 pm: Banana Splits. YES.
Can’t wait to do it all again next month.
Every 2nd Sunday
(Between W and X Streets - Under the freeway)
Admission is $3.00.
Children 16 and under are free
Parking is free
2011 Faire Dates:
- April 10
- May 8
- June 12
- July 10
- August 7
- September 11
- October 9
- November 13
- December 11
*Yes, my boy says some combination of these remarks EVERY single time we go.